WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
FOR SOME TIME MANY OF US HAVE WONDERED JUST WHO IS JACK SCHITT? WE FIND OURSELVESAT A LOSS WHEN SOMEONE SAYS, "YOU DON'T KNOW JACK SCHITT"! WELL THANKS TO MY GENEALOGY EFFORTS
YOU CAN NOW RESPOND IN A INTELLECTUAL WAY.
JACK SCHITT IS THE ONLY SON OF AWE SCHITT, THE FERTILIZER MAGNATE, MARRIED O. SCHITT THE OWNER OF NEEDEEP N. SCHITT INC.
THET HAD ONE SON JACK
IN TURN JACK SCHITT MARRIED NOE SCHITT, THE DEEPLY RELIGIOUS
PRODUCED SIX CHILDREN: HOLIE SCHITT, GIVA SCHITT, FULLA SCHITT,
BULL SCHITT, AND THE TWINS DEEP SCHITT AND DIP SCHITT
AGAINST HER PARENTS OBJECTION, DEEP SCHITT MARRIED DUMB SCHITT A HIGH SCHOOL DROP OUT. AFTER BEING MARRIED 15 YEARS
JACK AND NOE SCHITT DIVORCED. NOE SCHITT LATER MARRIED TED SHERLOCK
AND BECAUSE HER KIDS WERE LIVING WITH THEM, SHE WANTED TO KEEP HER PREVIOUS NAME. SHE WAS THEN KNOWN AS NOE SCHITT SHERLOCK
MEANWHILE DIP SCHITT MARRIED LODA SCHITT AND THEY PRODUCED A
SON WITH A RATHERNERVOUS DISPOSITION NAMED CHICKEN SCHITT.
TWO OF THE OTHER SIX CHILDREN,FULLA SCHITT AND GIVA SCHITT, WERE INSEPERABLE THROUGHOUT CHILDHOOD AND SUBSEQUENTLY MARRIED THE HAPPENS BROTHER'S IN A DUAL CEREMONY. THE ANNOUNCEMENT IN THE NEWPAPER ANNOUNCEDTHE SCHITT-HAPPENS
NUPTIALS. THE SCHITT-HAPPENS CHILDRE WERE DAWG, BYRD, AND HORSE.
BULL SCHITT THE PRODIGAL SON, LEFT HOME TO TOUR THE WORLD, HE RECENTLY RETURNED FROM ITALY WITH HIS NEW ITALIAN BRIDE, PISA
SCHITT.
NOW WHEN SOMEONE SAYS, "YOU DON'T KNOW JACK SCHITT", YOU CAN CORRECT THEM.
SINCERELY
CROCK O. SCHITT
