My son will be confirmed this June and I thought I would share this letter I wrote to him. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it
Dear Son,
I just wanted to type you a letter regarding your confirmation. I have to be the proudest dad on this planet! You are, without a doubt, the best son any man could ever wish for. The things you have had to endure; a divorce, a new step father, a new sister, the death of your grandparents, and you took these in stride. There aren’t a lot of adults, much less young adults, which could have taken these tasks head on. You have become an outstanding young man. I have watched you grow from an acorn, to the proud oak tree. We may not agree on everything, but, I hope you know that I’m not only your father, but your best friend too. I want you to feel like you can ask me anything without me judging or persecuting you. Life is hard enough, in itself, without having to worry about what your parents might think or do to you if you happen to make a mistake or a bad decision. I knew you were special the moment you were born. That day, I can easily say, was the best day of my life. You too will experience that feeling when you have children of your own. You have a good heart and head son. You will learn in life that sometimes they can disagree with one another. Sometimes you have to go with what your heart tells you, then, other times you have to go with what your head tells you. A wise man follows both. I want to share a poem with you given to me by a high school classmate and I’ve kept it all these years.
Live each day to the fullest.
Get the most from each hour, each day,
and each age of your life.
Then you can look forward with confidence,
and back without regrets.
Be yourself...but be your best self.
Dare to be different and follow your own star.
Don't be afraid to be happy...enjoy what is beautiful.
Love with all your heart and soul.
Believe that those you love, love you.
When you are faced with decision,
make that decision as wisely as possible, then forget it.
The moment of absolute certainty never arrives.
And above all, remember that God helps those who help themselves.
Act as if everything depended on you
And pray as if everything depended on God.
- SH Payer
I must admit that I have strayed from time to time from this poem, but if you follow its advice on a daily basis, you will live a happy life. Son, I want you to do what you want to do, not what you think me or your mother want you to do, such as playing football for example. I will still feel the same about you whether you play football or not. I want you to enjoy your high school years, not goof off on your studies, just enjoy them because they only last for four years, and then they are gone forever. Once you reach my age you will say to yourself, “Why didn’t I listen to what dad told me about high school”? In other words, these high school years are some of the best years of your life, so enjoy them. The same goes for college. You need to pick a major (job) that you will enjoy doing for the rest of your life, not just pick one that will make the most money. If you happen to pick a major you love and it makes you a lot of money, then you are lucky indeed. Also remember that a man cannot have too many friends. I am talking about true friends, not friends that are your friend one day, then gone the next. True friends are the type of people that will give you their shirt off their back, no questions asked. I don’t want to sound like I’m preaching or lecturing to you. I just wanted to give you some sound advice man to man, and father to son. I wish my father had talked to me more. I hope I made him half as proud as I am of you. I hope and pray that you realize that I will always be here for you son, through the good times and the bad times. Trust me, if you weren’t there for me when I was having some bad times, I don’t know what I would have done, and for that I thank you. You are more mature than your year’s son, and for that I am truly grateful. I could not have hand picked a better son. I am so proud of you. I love you so much son. I am so grateful that God gave me such a wonderful gift in my life, and I happen to call that gift son.
Love always,
Dad
