> >>Subject: BEANS
> >Date: Thu, 24 Aug 2006 06:28:25 -0400
> >
> >
> >if this doesnt make you smile, better check for a pulse. maybe you've
> >seen it before,but it is still cute
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>If you are having a down day - this will really pick you up
> >>Baked Beans - This is hilarious! (This one is much too cute
> >>not to share. Enjoy! Be sure to grab a tissue; I think you'll be
> >>laughing so hard you'll cry!)
> >>One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it
> >>became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and
> >>gave up beans. Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the
> >>way
> >>home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband
> >>and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On
> >>my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more
> >>than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk
> >>off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the
> >>diner and before I knew it, I had consumed t three large orders of baked
> >>beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
> >>Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and
> >>exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
> >>He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner
> >>table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold,
> >>the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he
> >>returned
> >>and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still
> >>affecting me and the
> >>pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was
> >>out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg
> >>and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a
> >>fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took
> >>my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously.
> >>Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink
> >>was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to
> >>the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another
> >>few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the
> >>telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly
> >>fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap
> >>and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased
> >>with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my
> >>husband
> >>returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had
> >>peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this
> >>point,he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around
> >>the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"
> >>I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
